Partial Rotation

I zazen just now and felt that part of my body is rotated, from the right to the left, and worse, it hangs there. But anyway it does not matter, just that it is part of the possible changes when I go into the void. I have a feeling that when I achieved full enlightenment, there will be nothing so-called rotation, floating or anything. Just nothing. And that's the time when I forget everything about 'me'.

Had that slight feeling during zazen and straight my body is disturbed. Now I can observe the little twitch in my body whenever I have something crossing my mind during zazen. This is indeed a great leap.

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The Beginning of Realization

You think, therefore you are. That was thought as one of the 'fundamentals' of philosophy as laid out by Descrates. In fact, he is right. Everything you are, is what you conjured up in your mind. That's why there are so many people on this earth telling everybody that they can't find themselves. It's just impossible to find yourself bah, since your mind leads you here and there and everywhere while you are seeking.

Have you been seeing what you are seeing? Ask yourself that. Have you been doing something, or just trying to do something?

Why is it so hard for you to sleep? Are you really sleeping, or just trying to sleep? It is very different. If you are just trying to sleep, your mind is very noisy. You think of your lover, you think of your traumas today, you think of what you gonna do tomorrow. Man, you think of so many things, no wonder you can't sleep. You are just not sleeping.

Realize this, and you will realize your very mind is what separates you from reality and you. You are in the past, in the future, all the while, just not in the moment of 'now'. That's why your mind is so cloudy, your sight so murky, and you can't hear a lot of things. Your mind is so noisy that it deceives you of all things surrounding you through bending your perceptions.

Realize this, and something will start to transform in you.

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